QUESTION: Orthodox Evangelism?

I hope the regulars — even those in the “drive by blogosphere” — will assist me with a talk that I am scheduled to give this coming Friday, February 3rd, at St Jonah of Manchuria Church in Spring, Texas.

The topic: Orthodox Evangelism.

You are welcome, in the Comments below, to share your thoughts — the Good, the Bad, the Ugly — on the topic. Comments are moderated and may not be posted if they are, oh … too ugly.

If you wish, you may email suggestions to me (orthodixie at aol dot com).

Emails may be subject to anonymization and reposting here on the blog. However, anonymous responses will be (forgive me) deleted. Also, with the current load of house blessings, it may be a while before Comments are approved and show up on the blog. Thank you for your patience.

I’d appreciate your thoughts.

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A Priest Named Sue — Is Outrage!

It’s like a cyclical thing … from Venus (I guess you could say).

No, those aren’t Orthodox women in the photo. They claim to be Catholic. They also claim to be …

Oh, never mind. Just pretend they’re soccer moms in an advanced Pottery Class on a rainy day and all will be well.

Click Dixie’s link above for some interesting reading. Here’s an excerpt:

I can’t tell you how it happened or identify the discussion that led up to it but all of a sudden I found myself in the middle of a group of women pushing for female ordination. I honestly was having a hard time breathing. I would have gotten up and left the lecture if I hadn’t been trapped in a central area that would have called attention to my leaving and disrupted others in the process. This took me by such surprise I didn’t even default to the “Jesus Prayer”. I just sat there while anxiety filled my emptiness.

I walked back to my room alone, wondering “What in the world have I signed up for?” I don’t know why I was so naïve to think that Holy Chrism takes away the lures of this world. Just because one is Orthodox does not mean …

In the meantime, and competely unrelated …

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
And I called him my pa, and he called me his son,
And I came away with a different point of view.
And I think about him, now and then,
Every time I try and every time I win,
And if I ever have a son, I think I’m gonna name him
Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!

Lyrics by Shel Silverstein, song by Johnny Cash (caveat lector).

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Mitsos & the Dog

Mitsos lived above his restaurant with only his beloved pet dog for company. One day the dog died and Mitsos went to the parish priest and asked, “Father, my dog died. Could you do a Trisagion for the poor animal? He was like a son to me.”

Father Nikos shook his head, “I’m afraid not; we cannot have services for an animal in the church. But, there’s a Unitarian church on the next block, and God knows what they believe. Maybe they’ll do something for your dog.”

Mitsos said, “I’ll go right away Father. Do you think $5,000 is enough to donate to them for the service?”

Father Niko exclaimed, “Kyrie Eleison, Mitso! Why didn’t you tell me the dog was Greek Orthodox?”

A new spin on an old joke … sent to me by Margo (a Greek Orthodox woman).

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TODAY: Flo, Chekhov, Optina & Darwin

Tch! Having seen it “bubble” from her lips in a strip long ago, I used to think these words were original to Mr Capp‘s wife, Flo:

“Any idiot can face a crisis; it is this day-to-day living that wears you out.”

— Anton Chekhov (born on this date in 1860)

St Maximos the Confessor: “Many of the things that befall us, befall us for our training, either to do away with past sins or to correct present neglect or to check future sinful deeds. He then, who reckons that temptation has come upon him for one of these reasons, is not vexed at its attack, especially as he is conscious of his sin.”

John Lennon: “Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans.”

In light of the above quotes -– all true -– by a writer, a saint, and a musician: Would that we were better prepared for those things that just “happen.” Wouldn’t it be nice if we got out of bed knowing full well that the Lord would send us trials to help us toward patience? Would that we got into our cars fully expecting the other drivers on the road to break all the rules, to help us toward patience? What if we determined, before our day even began, to look the other way when tempted by lust -– and then followed through with our promise as soon, and often, as able? What if we decided, just for one day, to go without participating in gossip, anger, swearing, or gluttony? (What if you are already doing this and I am the only one missing the boat?)

Prayer of the Optina Elders:
Grant unto me, O Lord, that with peace of mind I may face all that this new day is to bring. Grant unto me to dedicate myself completely to Thy Holy Will. For every hour of this day, instruct and support me in all things. Whatsoever tidings I may receive during the day, do Thou teach me to accept tranquilly, in the firm conviction that all eventualities fulfill Thy Holy Will. Govern Thou my thoughts and feelings in all I do and say. When things unforeseen occur , let me not forget that all cometh down from Thee. Teach me to behave sincerely and rationally toward every member of my family, that I may bring confusion and sorrow to none. Bestow upon me, my Lord, strength to endure the fatigue of the day, and to bear my part in all its passing events. Guide Thou my will and teach me to pray, to believe, to hope, to suffer, to forgive, and to love.
Amen

Finally, realizing that we often miss the mark with our fellow man, the late Darwin Kirby once wrote:

Sometimes at night, when I am saying my prayers, I end by saying — “God bless all the people that I don’t like and all the people who don’t like me.” And that covers a mighty multitude.

Now that sounds like a prayer even Andy Capp could pray!

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The Publican (the Jerk & the Janitor)

As we begin the Lenten Triodion with the Sunday of the Publican and Pharisee, here’s a re-post from a few years back:

As I walked in to the elementary school, I noticed a man up ahead of me wearing a hat similar to one I own. He was tall, lanky, seemed to know the teachers. He was black. I figured him to be the janitor.

I had to stop and ask directions to the library, where my son and others would be reading some of their award winning writings. I’d thought of asking the janitor, but he was too far ahead of me. Was I ever surprised to see the “janitor” sitting in the section reserved for the parents and grandparents. He seemed a nice chap. But as the room filled up with young authors’ kin, all white, I wondered how he felt amid a sea of Caucasians.

Eventually a white woman — really white, red hair, flushed cheeks — arrived and sat beside him. Very close beside him, with other chairs vacant. Ahhh, I get it. At least I did when their blended-race daughter arrived.

My gaze shifted back toward the students. I spotted a young Hispanic gal staring at the mixed-race family. I wondered what she thought. That sort of thing’s no big deal these days, I guess, especially among Hispanics. Right?

I remembered back when I was in middle school one of the white teachers started dating a black man. This would have been around 1973. That gossip grew long legs and provided fodder for kids, parents, staff, church, etc, for quite a while. But the teacher was a class act and she took it all in stride. Last I heard, they were still married.

One of my first weddings as an officiating priest was between a white woman and a black man. I didn’t try to talk them out of it. But I did encourage them toward the reality of such an arrangement in the South. I felt it might be rough for the children. They were determined; I said “I do” and they did.

The students’ talks were now under way. By the way, my son was chosen from among all of his classmates to present his writing, “My Construction Set”. Each classroom of each grade [he was in the first grade] was represented.

It came time for the pretty Mexican gal’s reading. Our area being known for apples, where many legal and illegal aliens from south of the border find employment, I quickly wondered about her home life. She opened her mouth and I was stunned. She was articulate.

I thought: “How silly! Of course she’s articulate! That’s what this is all about, no? What, did you think maybe she was chosen as the token Hispanic?”

Her subject? Martin Luther King, Jr. Here was a girl, perhaps in the 2nd grade, speaking about the 60’s and how blacks and whites weren’t allowed to be together back in those days. As she talked of 1968 and the slain civil rights leader, I cut my eyes over to the “mixed couple” and they were staring and beaming. As she finished, I felt foolish. What a jerk.

First of all, the sole black man in the room was not the janitor. The white woman with the red hair was his wife. And the Mexican gal could write and speak clearly. Well, duh.

Which brings me to my son. He did great! I mean really great! His reading had never been clearer; diction near perfect, volume optimal. I was so proud. As his certificate was presented to him, the lady said, “Maybe someday when you grow up, Basil, you can be an engineer and build houses right here in Henderson County.”

Growing up. Now that’s hard to imagine. But I thought about it, mine that is, sitting in that elementary school library, dressed like a priest. And how I have a long, long way to go …

Image taken from Anglican TK.

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