Lenten Policewoman, Age 7

One of my youngest daughter’s chores on Thursday is gathering all the individual trash bags from the bedrooms and bathrooms and depositing them in a larger bag to be carted down to the curb.

This morning, bearing a half dozen plump former grocery bags, she came over to me and whispered: “Dad, look what I found on the top of the trash in one of the waste baskets.”

I looked down to see her holding up a candy wrapper and, in that parental so what way, said: “Mmmm-hmmm.”

She said, “Dad … look at it: ‘Milk Chocolate with Almonds’ … we’re not supposed to be eating milk chocolate!”

Assuming the offender was an older sibling, one with whom she never ceases to tempt, argue, and play (see the pic above), I said: “Was it you?”

She said, emphatically: “No-o-o!”

I said, “Well, good. Just worry about yourself during the Fast, Sweetie. Just work on yourself.”

As her Dad is wont to say: You preach most what you most need to learn. 🙂

UPDATE: Further investigation has revealed that the offending wrapper was found on the floor a few days ago — hence, before the Fast — and was just recently thrown in the trash. (No charges have been filed.)

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The Fast is Always Greener on the Other Side of the Firmament

On Clean Monday, I noted in my morning journal:

“I can’t believe it’s finally here. Lent. Lent 2010. Fifty days for me to torment myself with discipline and guilt. I usually have little problem with the food fast part – but the struggle toward dispassion, repentance and alms giving … that’s where I fall. I not only fall, I then judge myself harshly; would that I judged myself lovingly toward repentance, confession, and amendment of life! But, oftentimes I just build a big ol’ ball of weighty guilt and carry it around with me as if that was a necessary Lenten exercise.

Lord have mercy.”

I had planned to “live pod” Clean Monday … but, instead, wound up singing duo with my teen aged daughter (at 6:30 AM on Pure Tuesday!) a parody of the Green Acres TV show theme song.

Anyway, it’s all here:

The Orthodixie Podcast on Ancient Faith Radio.

Oh … and stick around for the “outtakes” which follow the podcast’s outro.

(Forgive me.)

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The Rules of the Fast (Orthodox)

Just as a reminder [in other words, there’s no need to stone the messenger in the ComBox (hence, the cartoon at left)], here’s “The Rules of Fasting” — beginning with the first day of the Fast, Clean Monday — from The Lenten Triodion, translated by Mother Mary and Bishop Kallistos (Ware).

On weekdays (Monday to Friday inclusive) during the seven weeks of Lent, there are restrictions both on the number of meals taken daily and on the types of food permitted; but when a meal is allowed, there is no fixed limitation on the quantity of food to be eaten.

a) On weekdays in the first week, fasting is particularly severe. According to strict observance,in the course of the five initial days of Lent, only two meals are eaten, one on Wednesday and the other on Friday, in both cases after the Liturgy of the Presanctified. On the other three days, those who have the strength are encouraged to keep an absolute fast; those for whom this proves impracticable may eat on Tuesday and Thursday (but not, if possible, on Monday), in the evening after Vespers, when they may take bread and water, or perhaps tea or fruit-juice, but not a cooked meal. It should be added at once that in practice today these rules are commonly relaxed. At the meals on Wednesday and Friday xerophagy is prescribed. Literally, this means, “dry eating.” Strictly interpreted, it signifies that we may eat only vegetables cooked with water and salt, and also such things as fruit, nuts, bread and honey. In practice, octopus and shellfish are also allowed on days of xerophagy; likewise vegetable margarine and corn or other vegetable oil, not made from olives. But the following categories of food are definitely excluded:

1. Meat
2. Animal products (cheese, milk, butter, eggs, lard,drippings)
3. Fish (i.e., fish with backbones)
4. Oil (i.e., olive oil) and wine

b) On weekdays (Monday to Friday inclusive) in the second, third, fourth, fifth and sixth weeks, one meal a day is permitted, to be taken in the afternoon following Vespers, and at this one meal xerophagy is to be observed.

c) Holy Week. On the first three days there is one meal each day, with xerophagy; but some try to keep a complete fast on these days, or else they eat only uncooked food, as on the opening days of the first week.

On Holy Thursday one meal is eaten, with wine and oil (i.e., olive oil). On Great Friday those who have the strength follow the practice of the early Church and keep a total fast. Those unable to do this may eat bread, with a little water, tea or fruit-juice, but not until sunset, or at any rate not until after the veneration of the Winding-Sheet at Vespers.

On Holy Saturday there is in principle no meal, since according to the ancient practice after the end of the Liturgy of St. Basil the faithful remained in church for the reading of the Acts of the Apostles, and for their sustenance were given a little bread and dried fruit, with a cup of wine. If, as usually happens now, they return home for a meal, they may use wine but not oil; for on this one Saturday, alone among Saturdays of the year, olive oil is not permitted.

The rule of xerophagy is relaxed on the following days:

1) On Saturdays and Sundays in Lent, with the exception of Holy Saturday, two main meals may be taken in the usual way, around mid¬day and in the evening, with wine and olive oil; but meat, animal products and fish are not allowed.

2) On the Feast of the Annunciation (March 25) and Palm Sunday fish is permitted as well as wine and oil, but meat and animal products are not allowed …

3) Wine and oil are permitted on the following days,if they fall on a weekday in the second, third, fourth, fifth or sixth week:

• First & Second Finding of Head of St. John the Baptist (Feb. 24)
• Holy Forty Martyrs of Sebaste (Mar. 9)
• Fore-feast of the Annunciation (Mar. 24)
• Synaxis of the Archangel Gabriel (Mar. 26)
• Holy Great martyr and Victory bearer George (April 23)
• Holy Apostle and Evangelist Mark (April 25)
• Holy Apostle and Evangelist John the Theologian (May 8)
• Patronal Feast of the Church or Monastery

4) Wine and oil are also allowed on Wednesday and Thursday in the fifth week, because of the vigil for the Great Canon. Wine is allowed —and, according to some authorities, oil as well — on Friday in the same week, because of the vigil of the Akathist Hymn.

It has always been held that these rules of fasting should be relaxed in the case of anyone elderly or in poor health. In present-day practice, even for those in good health, the full strictness of the fast is usually mitigated. Only a few Orthodox today attempt to keep a total fast on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday in the first week, or on the first three days of Holy Week. On weekdays — except, perhaps, during the first week of Holy Week—it is now common to eat two cooked meals daily instead of one. From the second until the sixth week, many Orthodox use wine, and perhaps oil also, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and less commonly on Mondays as well. Permission is often given to eat fish in these weeks. Personal factors need to be taken into account, as for example the situation of an isolated Orthodox living in the same household as non-Orthodox, or obliged to take meals in a factory or school. In cases of uncertainty each should seek the advice of his or her spiritual father. At all times it is essential to bear in mind that “you are not under the law but under grace” (Rom. 6:14), and that “the letter kills, but the spirit gives life” (2 Cor. 3:6). The rules of fasting, while they need to be taken seriously, are not to be interpreted with dour and pedantic legalism; “for the kingdom of God is not food and drink, but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit” (Rom. 14:17).

Thanks to an annual FWD from Fr Mark Mancuso.
Image Source

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My Low Bow


On this Sunday of Forgiveness, I beg you — faithful readers, lurkers, and surfers — to forgive my many sins, failings, and shortcomings. Prayers coveted and assured, for you and yours, as we prepare, during this holy season of the Great Fast, to meet the Lord in the Bright and Glorious Day of Resurrection (Pascha – April 4, 2010).

— Unworthy Priest Joseph

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REVIEW: Grits, Greeks & Elvis?

Q: What do grits, Greeks, and Elvis have in common?

A: Fr. Joseph Huneycutt and his new book We Came, We Saw, We Converted.

Fr. Huneycutt has filled this book with humorous observations on Eastern Orthodoxy and Southern living, often combining and interweaving the two in a way that makes one think he was raised Southern Orthodox instead of Southern Baptist. Taken from his weekly podcast Orthodixie on Ancient Faith Radio, this light-hearted priest pokes fun at US southern culture as well as the 2000 year old faith and traditions of the Orthodox Church the way only a loving son of both can. However, the message of this book is clear: Live faithfully, love fully, and above all else … keep a sense of humor.

— Doug Burns

Order from Conciliar Press; order from Amazon.

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