Oh Dear! (Abby)

Dear Abby:

Mother’s Day is coming up and I want to take my mother out for a nice lunch. Only I have to decide: Melissa was the one who gave birth to me in the hospital 24 years ago, and she nursed me (though I don’t remember any of this). My other mom, Sally, the woman with whom my mother lived and also who took care of me; in fact, she was the one who drove me to my first day of school and was home much more often than Melissa, who made lots of money but had to work downtown at a law firm to do it. Now Melissa and Sally aren’t speaking to each other anymore; and I can’t mention the name of one in the presence of the other. The last time I mentioned Melissa to Sally, I was told that Sally gave the egg that turned into me, so I was really Sally’s son, not Melissa’s. I asked Melissa about this, and she told me it was all true, but that Sally didn’t really do very much and that she …

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New JP Pat: Update & Vitae

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A new Patriarch in the Holy Land?

Athens/Jerusalem (dpa) – Jerusalem’s Greek Orthodox Church elected a new patriarch Monday, replacing embattled Irineos the First after his alleged involvement in leasing property in east Jerusalem.

A body of 50 clergy and leaders, both Greek and Arab, selected Bishop Theophilos, the official in charge of the Church of the Holy Sepulchre, to be the new 97th patriarch of Jerusalem from among 13 candidates including the secretary general of the Jerusalem Patriarch Aristarchos and bishops Timothy and Cornelius. More …

Oh, and …

With the election of 54-year-old Theophilos, Jerusalem’s Greek Orthodox Church will have two patriarchs: Irineos the First, who is recognised only by Israel and the newly elected patriarch recognised by most of the Orthodox world and by Jordan and the Palestinian Authority.

Sigh.

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Spacing Out

On a trip to Mars
I passed the stars
And really thought I was dreaming
And then I looked
It looked like a book
But somehow I started believing

How I got here
I don’t really know
How I believed
I can’t really show
But with this trip to Mars
And seeing the stars
I know I couldn’t have been dreaming

By Mary Catherine Huneycutt, age 11.

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On Being a Hillbilly

Back in 1986 I was working at a little radio station, WIFM, in Elkin, North Carolina. It had been a while since I’d “spun” Country and when I came to a 45 by Dwight Yoakam, I wasn’t sure how to pronounce the name. I was alone, there wasn’t time to ask, so I announced the artist as Dwight Yo-AHH-kum. Dwight was new, I was new; the program director was gentle.

As Dwight said on Friday night at Western Carolina University in Cullowhee, that was over 18 years ago. He didn’t mention me of course, but I was at the show. In fact, he’s part of our family. It’s a mixed family which includes, among others, one Prince and two Georges (Strait & Clinton). My wife and I will celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary in November. Dwight’s been there the whole time.

Looking around at those gathered for the event, I was struck by how much we all looked alike. Young men with pony tails and cowboy hats, older men with caps, women all dressed up; couples. To say it was a mostly Caucasian audience would be an understatement. A goodly number of folks in their 60’s & 70’s — mixed in with a bunch of college kids. I felt a little ancient when I realized that some of the fans weren’t even born when Dwight released “Honky Tonk Man” and “Guitars & Cadilacs” back in ’86. They’ve always known how to pronounce “Yo-Kum”. But everyone knew the words to most of the songs, old and young alike. Country. It’s a culture.

I’m no Charlie Daniels fan, though I did see him at the Big Ways Birthday Ball back in 1973, yet as the opening act he and his band did a good job. He even gave a Christian “testimonial” and sang a gospel hymn which, dang!, was great.

During the break between the two acts, Dwight’s pre-show music was all Conway Twitty. That would never have been my choice. But to see the older crowd, hardened working men and women, mouthing the words to each song as people milled about was priceless. That’s where I come from.

Dwight kept us waiting, not taking the stage till 9:35 pm. At one point the twenty-something gal sitting next to my wife had shouted: “Come on Dwight, honey, it’s almost my bedtime!” She was a hoot. After seemingly ALL of Conway Twitty’s hits had been played she said, “Well I’ve heard all those songs before, but not all at one time. Come on, Dwight!”

Except for Miss Twenty-Something, who wanted him in jeans, Dwight didn’t disappoint. He’s no grand showman, mind you, but I’m a sucker for singer-song writers and artists who do what they do and not what they’re told they should do for mass consumption. In that respect, Dwight’s way cool — never even took a sip of water and played for nearly two hours before encore. I got the impression that if it weren’t already late, he’d have played for two more.

The highlight of his performance was a bluegrass tribute to Jimmy Martin, who passed away May 14th. Bluegrass, in these parts, is like a religion. And when one of the biggies passes, it’s a big deal.

On the way home on Saturday, the wife and I took the Blue Ridge Parkway. (That’s where she snapped the pic below.) You live in these parts long enough and you can begin to take the scenery for granted. The Parkway has a way of shaking you out of it. I don’t often claim it, but following Dwight & Drive, I’ll humbly accept the above title.

It’s where I come from.

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