Orthodixie

Much of the nation is currently in the midst of a summer heat wave; those of us in Houston welcome you …

It’s easy to make fun of the heat and humidity in Houston, you can even complain of the mosquitoes and the dreaded hurricane season …

But, like a friend of mine says, “Heck, if it weren’t for heat, humidity, mosquitoes, and hurricanes … everyone would want to live here!”

Houston is also known for its hospitals … Baylor College of Medicine, Texas Children’s, St Luke’s, Methodist, Hermann Memorial, MD Anderson (just to name a few) … the Texas Medical Center is like a city of tall buildings unto itself.

Hospitals have elevators. Houston has lots of — many, many, many — elevators.

In the past couple years I have become a quick study of elevator-ology. Assuming it’s all spiritual warfare, please pardon my diversion to and fro a few floors of logic here — perhaps even a good word or two — while I speak of elevators.

Push the button, up or down. And wait. Sometimes you wait a long

long

Long

time …

to go a couple floors.

That’s if you’re lucky.

Actually, if you’re lucky …

You might even know where you’re going — And get there in good time.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! WE HAVE A WINNER!

Many times, if you’re like me, you’re just winging your way through most of this chaos and, thank God and an over-worked Guardian Angel, you eventually make your destination.

Incidentally …

I remember once riding a hospital elevator – a car full of folks – in one of those hospitals where the 3rd floor, being a surgical floor, was not listed on the menu or overhead. One of the ladies said, “Hunh … wonder why they don’t have a THIRD floor.” Without thinking I said …

Listen to the Orthodixie Podcast on Ancient Faith Radio.

At the time that religious freedom is preached by Prime Minister Recep Tayip Erdogan, the Turkish occupation forces brutally expelled the abbot of the oldest Greek Cypriot Orthodox monastery this week.

Government Spokesman Vasilis Palmas condemned Thursday the expulsion of the abbot of the monastery of Apostolos Varnavas (Saint Barnabas) in the northern occupied part of Cyprus in the middle of a church service …

More.

Thanks to FWD from Jean-Michel.

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Back in my days in the Russian Church,where the length of the Saturday Vigil dictates perseverance, quality knees, and comfy shoes (or, as a friend calls it: 3 hours of back breaking, ankle swelling, Russian religion) … Our Mission had a visitor one night — a man who was in the area to interview with some sort of eye of newt, wing of bat Natural Foods / Macrobiotic type company.

After Vigil, I was tired and grumpy. Naturally, that was when there came a knock at the door. There stood the visitor rubbing his tummy and talking about being hungry and how he’d really like some Miso Soup.

Is this normal?

As if under a spell, I let him in. He asked if we had any Miso … y’all, this was Western North Carolina — of course we did!

Then, though I can’t remember the potion directions, he brewed up some of the best Miso Soup I have ever, ever tasted.

Better yet, before ladling it out, he told me: “Fr Joseph, this will cure your grumpy mood this soup will open up the pores of your body — revitalizing every cell; you will get the best night’s sleep … my words, not his: “It’ll cure what ails ya.”

It did.

It. Was. Amazing.

I thought of that guy, John Granger, yesterday when I finished the final installment of the Harry Potter series.

I thought of him the day before, too — on the Feast of the Transfiguration — when my family went for Miso Soup & Sushi following Liturgy.

Actually, I think of him every time I eat Miso Soup, which has never tasted so good as when Granger enchanted opened my pores.

Even as I was writing this blog post, while I was confirming events with my wife, my 13 year old (who has read all the HPs) exclaimed: “Y’all know John Granger?!!”

We said, “Yeah, why?”

“Because he’s like the Harry Potter guy of the universe!”

We laughed — “Huh?”

She said, “No … I mean he’s like the Harry-Potter-Christian-Symbolism Guy!”

That he is.

Still not sure about Harry Potter and Christianity?

Check out his Site, read his books — and, trust me, if he ever knocks at your door rubbing his tummy and wanting to pull out the ol’ cauldron …

… you’d better have some Miso or prepare for a good hexing.

MORE.

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“You haven’t updated your blog since the Dragon Thing?”

That was yesterday.

This morning, 6 AM … I read the last word in Book Seven.

Now what?

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Thursday, July 26th started out like any other day …

That is until 10:30 AM.

I live and work in Houston, Texas. My parish is St George. And it was on that day, Thursday, July 26th, that I must begin this week’s Podcast …

As I said, it was like any other day … except for the Big Black SUV that pulled into St George Church parking lot at approximately 10:30 AM. From my office window, I only noticed that I did not recognize the man emerging in the dark RayBan sunglasses. That’s nothing unusual; it’s a big city, big parish … and sunglasses in Houston? Common.

Things got a little curiouser when the secretary, Diane, yelled back: “Fr Joseph … a Mister Mister here to see you.”

Having survived the 80’s I’d heard of Mister Mister … they’d only had a couple hit songs in the — “Broken Wings”, the chorus of which was later sampled on the 2Pac single “Until the End of Time”. They had several number 1 MTV videos and headlined the first MTV Spring Break show in 1986. Mr Mister had several Grammy Award nominations including the 1986 Grammy for “Best Pop Band” (which ended up going to the “We Are the World” people).

During this time, Mr. Mister toured with other popular acts including Don Henley, The Bangles, Eurythmics, Adam Ant, and Tina Turner …

They even had a song called “Kyrie” — probably my first exposure to Greek Orthodoxy … though I had no idea.

But, I digress …

I replied: “Who?”

“A Mr Mister,” she said.

Oh well … though I’d thought they were a group, stranger things have happened.

So I walked out into the foyer and greeted Mr Mister: “Hello, I’m Fr Joseph …”

“Mister Mister,” he replied. “I represent the People for the Ethical Treatment of Dragons … got a place where we can sit down?”

Listen to the Orthodixie Podcast on Ancient Faith Radio.